MEN'S 28 DAYS TO LOVING MY WIFE CHALLENGE DAY 25 - LEADERSHIP #4

LEADERSHIP IS NOT TO DEMONSTRATE POWER

Theme Verse: Ephesians 5:29

For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

Yesterday, we spoke about the Spiritual Leader and established that the spiritual leader builds a relationship with Jesus Christ to be able to lead his family spiritually.

To be able to govern your family, you must build a relationship with them. You can't govern effectively if you don't know your people and or their needs!

Today, we will move to the second definition of leadershp:
"The state or position of being a leader- directorship, governorship, administration, ascendancy;

TODAY'S ACTIVITY: LEADERSHIP GOVERNMENT

Besides building a relationship with your family, as a leader you must take the responsibility for the home and family.

How you govern and rule as a father and husband would determine that.

As director, how do you direct- Are you leading your family in the right direction in every area of life?
As the governor, how is your ruling-Do you rule as a Pharaoh, what you say goes, no questions ask or it's my way or no way?
In administration, what do you administer-Do you love and nurture, apply grace and demonstrate affection to pain and nurse their hurt, offer good advice, organized and follow a plan, support their goals and ambitions?
In ascendancy, how to you control and influence- Do you occupy the position of a positive influence and control with knowledge, wisdom and understanding?

The position of leadership government is not about you but about your family. It's not stressing your position as the "man of the house" but the servant-ready to serve your family.
It is not a political position to earn votes or points but establishing fair and equitable distribution among the family members.
It is not to criticize the mistakes but give opportunities to learn valuable lesson and provide encouragement.
It is also to be open and share your plans, provide clarity as you administer direction and or discipline.
Lead with positive affirmation, demonstration to impact and influence change.
Lead as God leads as as He requires you to do.

Here's your guide for your spouse:
Ephesians 5:25-28 (KJV)
Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself

Use this guide for your Children:
Ephesians 6:4 (KJV)
And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

Caution: "RESPONSIBILITY IS NOT POWER!"
Use the golden rule and ask in your directing, governing, administering and influencing, what would Jesus do?  THEN DO IT!!!!

Remember, MARRIAGE IS A TEAM EFFORT-COMMON PURPOSE!

Don't be discouraged if she doesn't receive it at first or perhaps question your motive. Just do it- Get it Together First! Watch God in the next 28 days!

Please leave your comments, and help another brother by sharing this post!

#28daystolovingmywife or www.twigscog.org
Taking the risk-training to enhance your marriage and give the next generation a change to emulate.

God Bless you and Keep the Faith! 

Virtuous Jewel

MEN'S 28 DAYS TO LOVING MY WIFE CHALLENGE DAY 24 - LEADERSHIP #3

PRIEST OF THE HOME 

Theme Verse: Ephesians 5:29
For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

Who is the spiritual leader in your home?
Is it your wife or saved child/children?
Do you have a PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP with Jesus? (not just church attendance)

You may not be called to preach or teach, but it does not excuse you from being the Priest of your home. This is your stage for leading God's people (your family) with respect for God and the principles of life such as integrity, honesty, reverence etc...

Sabbath Shalom!

TODAY'S ACTIVITY - SPIRITUAL LEADER

God gave a government model for the home:

Christ-Husband-Wife - How does that work? 

Look at the character and life of Christ and reflect on Ephesians 5:25. 

The character of Christ is based on love. 

Therefore, as a spiritual leader, every word, action or behavior should be demonstrated in love.

When last....
You went to church with your family?
Gave a call to worship, prayer or spiritual declaration in your home?
Provide spiritual guidance/support? (not preaching to or at)
Offered encouragement to your wife/children?
Demonstrated what you preach through prayer discipline, bible reading habits and spiritual involvement?

Take a spiritual initiative for yourself and or family?

These should be in the profile of a spiritual leader:

• You must be the most honorable and respected man your family will ever know. Like the Proverbs 31 Woman, you must be known for spiritual and natural influence. 
• You must be characterized by integrity and tend to the well being of your family. 
• While weekly church attendance is in order, your spirituality should not be based only on making sure your family goes to church but that you go with them. When you are the priest and spiritual leader of your home, you will bring that fragrance to join with other believers in fellowship. 
• Your spiritual leadership includes providing support and encouragement applauding efforts and praying their strength in areas where they are weak. 
• Your life should represent what you teach them-Not "do as I say and not as I do" lifestyle.
• You must have a relationship with Jesus Christ to be an effective leader.

Caution: Don't mix spiritual leadership in the home with church leadership as an assignment or calling of God! Don't use you not being a Christian to not be the spiritual leader in your home-it's much more than that! The husband rules the house- Christ runs and governs the church!

Jesus was a "servant" leader - Be the example of Christ you want your family to follow! 

Declare like Joshua: 

"but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord." Joshua 24:15.

Remember, MARRIAGE IS A TEAM EFFORT-COMMON PURPOSE!

Don't be discouraged if she doesn't receive it at first or perhaps question your motive. Just do it- Get it Together First!
Watch God in the next 28 days!

Please leave your comments, and help another brother by sharing this post!

#28daystolovingmywife
Taking the risk-training to enhance your marriage and give the next generation a change to emulate.

God Bless and Keep the Faith!

Virtuous Jewel

MEN'S 28 DAYS TO LOVING MY WIFE CHALLENGE DAY 23 - LEADERSHIP #2

A MAN OR MANICOU

Theme Verse: Ephesians 5:29
For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

Have you figured out your role or are you just doing what you are told to do?

Are you a man or a manicou? 

This old adage question is used to question the manliness of men when they are acting out of character of their manhood.

A little bit of "serious humor" - Here's my version:
A man was out with his friends and they were all talking about their wives and how they ran things in the home. It was getting late and he was being teased that his wife would get him. They coached him and told him when she says anything to tell her that he is the man of the house and what he says goes.
He went home and as he approached his wife jumped him asking, where have you been. He dashed under the bed. With a broomstick in her hand she ordered him out from other the bed. As she orders and threatens him, he shouts.....
I AM THE MAN OF THE HOUSE AND WHAT I SAY GOES...
I AM NOT COMING OUT and when I say, I'M NOT COMING OUT, I'M NOT COMING OUT!!!!

Hilarious huh? Is that how you are in charge?

TODAY'S ACTIVITY - LARGE AND IN CHARGE

Your role as the man (head) of the home is an important one.
It goes far beyond lip service and words.

The old addage question, are you a man or a manicou provokes the following: 

Do you have the backbone to stand up and perform your role as the head as ordered by the Lord?
Do you provide guidance, direction, supervision, discipline to the children or do you leave it up to your wife alone?
Do you control and manage the affairs or relate to your wife on difficult issues?
Do people know that and respect you are the authorative figure in the home?
Do you take the lead to ensure that matters are resolved?
Do you procrastinate?
Do you allow others to take care of your manly responsibilities?

HOW YOU LARGE AND IN CHARGE:

You must have the backbone to stand up as the head of the home and not be a coward.
You must provide your family with guidance and direction
You must supervise with loving support and discipline in love
You must be in the forefront of all the affairs of your home and not hide or go silent on difficult issues
If you give permission to your spouse or children, you must follow through and inquire if the matter was resolved and taken care of
Your wife, children and others must know you as the authorative figure and not known as a whimp, whussy or manicou
You must follow through on matters of the home until they are resolved and seek help in matters beyond your control
You must take care of matters within a reasonable time frame
You must not give the responsibilities that is yours to others

To convince the gainsayers you must be a model first!

Titus 1:8-9 Living Bible (TLB)
They must enjoy having guests in their homes and must love all that is good. They must be sensible men, and fair. They must be clean minded and level headed.
Their belief in the truth that they have been taught must be strong and steadfast so that they will be able to teach it to others and show those who disagree with them where they are wrong.

Caution: Watch your behavior in that role- You are setting an example for your sons or other young men, and you are also telling your daughter that men should treat her how you treat her mother!

Learn to face the music-You will dance to the music you create!

Remember, MARRIAGE IS A TEAM EFFORT-COMMON PURPOSE!
Don't be discouraged if she doesn't receive it at first or perhaps question your motive. Just do it- Get it Together First!
Watch God in the next 28 days!

Please leave your comments, and help another brother by sharing this post!

#28daystolovingmywife
Taking the risk-training to enhance your marriage and give the next generation a change to emulate.

God Bless you and Keep the Faith! 

Virtuous Jewel

MEN'S 28 DAYS TO LOVING MY WIFE CHALLENGE DAY 22 - LEADERSHIP #1

YOU ARE CALLED TO LEAD 

God has called you to rule your household with diligence and love. This is a place of honor that he has called you to.  You will be responsible for not just your life but the lives of others?  

Theme Verse: Ephesians 5:29
For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

LAST WEEK OF THE CHALLENGE!!!! 

I am believing that you who have taken on the challenge are better at communicating, intimacy and have a handle on your finances.

In this final week we will pursue your role as a leader in the home.
Who wears the pants in your family-Who's running the household?

Let's begin with a little humor:

"There is a story of a man who died and went to heaven to find two signs above two different lines. One sign said: "ALL THOSE MEN WHO HAVE BEEN DOMINATED BY THEIR WIVES, STAND HERE." That line of men seemed to stretch off through the clouds into infinity.
The second sign read: "ALL THOSE WHO HAVE NEVER BEEN DOMINATED BY THEIR WIVES, STAND HERE." Underneath the sign stood one man.
He went over to the man, grabbed his arm and said, "What's the secret, how did you do it? That other line has millions of men and you are the only one standing in this line."
The man looked around with a puzzled expression and said, "Why, I am not sure I know. My wife just told me to stand here."

It would be nice if only all men were that way- LOL Unfortunately all are not!

The approach to this topic could vary depending on culture, upbringing, influence and spirituality.
We also recognize that there are various types of leadership styles that can be utilized accordingly- situation, need, challenge, environment etc.....
In this forum we will be using the leadership example of Christ from our key text scripture and profile of Ephesians 5. So no matter the situation that you lead in, you must do it as Christ would.

TODAY'S ACTIVITY- UNDERSTANDING YOUR ROLE

Let's establish the meaning of leadership-
For our week's topic we will use the following:

The action of leading a group of people or an organization.
"different styles of leadership" - guidance, direction, control, management, supervision;

The state or position of being a leader- directorship, governorship, governance, administration, captaincy, control, ascendancy, supremacy, rule, command, power, dominion, influence;

After reviewing the above definitions, reflect on the action of leading and the state or position of being a leader, and answer the following:

What role do you play as a leader?
Are you rightfully positioned?
Do you have difficulty in doing any of them?
How do you act and perform in the various styles and positions?

1 Corinthians 11:3 (KJV)
But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

Caution: DON'T BE A PHARAOH!
Being in charge and being the leader does not give you a bossy character- There's a difference in being "bossy" and being boss!

Remember, MARRIAGE IS A TEAM EFFORT-COMMON PURPOSE!

Don't be discouraged if she doesn't receive it at first or perhaps question your motive. Just do it- Get it Together First! Watch God in the next 28 days!

Please leave your comments, and help another brother by sharing this post!

#28daystolovingmywife
Taking the risk-training to enhance your marriage and give the next generation a change to emulate.

God Bless you and Keep the Faith! 

Virtuous Jewel 

MEN'S 28 DAYS TO LOVING MY WIFE CHALLENGE Day 21 - FINANCES # 7

SEED THOUGHTS 

Theme Verse: Ephesians 5:29
For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

Even if your wife is the financial manger, you SHOULD take the responsibility of the finances or at least know about it!

Today concludes our week on finances. I trust that you are well ready and challenged to do something about your financial position.

The objective of this week's topic was geared to help:
Give you an opportunity to improve your financial position.
Identify your goals/Life stage
Better manage your debts
Understand and Maintain a Budget
Survive Economical Hard Times
Protect your investment & family
Prepare for retirement/future
Enjoy the freedom of financial stability

TODAY'S ACTIVITY- FINANCIAL ADVICE

This will be provided to you in two parts-Manage and Secure:

MANAGE YOUR FINANCES: 
Have a plan
Review/Adjust your plan
Plan your Menus/Expenses
Pay bills timely
Don’t buy things on impulse
Don’t over obligate yourself
Practice self control
Stick to your budget
Don’t live on your credit cards
Learn to say No/Not yet

SECURE YOUR FINANCES:
Pay your tithes faithfully
Live within yours means
Have a reserve
Remember your ABCs’
Have a giving spirit
Keep accurate records
Don’t borrow or co-sign for anyone
Save – Every penny counts
Don’t live to impress anyone
Don’t forget to treat yourself

While God provides and is faithful to His promise to always provide- YOU ARE COMMANDED TO BE GOOD STEWARDS!

Caution: Quit putting the financial responsibility of your home on your spouse. If you are not working, get a job or develop a business! Even if she manages the money-IT'S YOUR RESPONSIBILITY!

Leadership-Next week's topic

Remember, MARRIAGE IS A TEAM EFFORT-COMMON PURPOSE!

Don't be discouraged if she doesn't receive it at first or perhaps question your motive. Just do it- Get it Together First!
Watch God in the next 28 days!

Please leave your comments, and help another brother by sharing this post!

#28daystolovingmywife
Taking the risk-training to enhance your marriage and give the next generation a change to emulate.

God Bless you and Keep the Faith! 

Virtuous Jewel

MEN'S 28 DAYS TO LOVING MY WIFE CHALLENGE DAY 20 - FINANCES # 6

DON'T BE A FOOL IN YOUR OWN EYES

Theme Verse: Ephesians 5:29
For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

Even if your wife is the financial manger, you SHOULD take the responsibility of the finances or at least know about it!

It was nice meeting with you last night!
You should be ready today to keep track of your pennies by ensuring that you record everything that you spend or income received so you can be ready to maximize on your goals and pay off your debts!

Proverbs 12:15 King James Version (KJV)
The way of a fool is right in his own eyes: but he that hearkeneth unto counsel is wise.

Financial Advice is costly, and the wise listens to good advice! 

TODAY'S ACTIVITY- LEARN TO BE S.M.A.R.T.

The acronym means Spend Money At Right Time

Have you been spending money on the whims/impulse?
Do you hold a large some of money when you go out with your friends or shopping?
Do you pay just the minimum payment on your credit card or mortgage?
Do you do groceries without a list?
Do you know when your bills are paid?
Do you save or have a saving plan?
Are your bills more than your income?

Today, you will be S.M.A.R.T. 

Plan your expenses, and do not spend what's not budget
When going out take with you the minimum that you have budgeted for, and you don't have to spend it
Always pay a little more on your credit card than the minimum payment. Try to budget for the finance charges and an amount that you want to decrease the balance. For your mortgage you will pay the payment required and a little extra to the principal
Make a list when going grocery shopping, mall or event
Get a calendar and record on the date due the bill and the amount
Budget an amount for saving every month-include vacation, future purchase and or retirement. Also recommend that you begin a saving for 3-6 months of your regular bills/emergencies
Do your daily diary-Take a look at where you spend your money. It may not be the income is too small, but it may be your spending habits needs to be controlled. If your income is lower than your expenses begin a plan to eliminate your debts and watch your expenses.

Struggling with savings? 

I have attached a 52 weeks savings challenge plan for you to begin a savings habit. You can put in the amount to meet this month's balance or you can begin this week as your first week. 

HAVE A PLAN FOR THE SAVINGS - USE IT WISELY!

Caution: USE ONLY FUNDS THAT ARE BUDGET FOR
Have a reserve so you don't have to borrow money for emergencies. Go back and do days 1-5 so you can be prepared for March's budget.

Remember, MARRIAGE IS A TEAM EFFORT-COMMON PURPOSE!

Don't be discouraged if she doesn't receive it at first or perhaps question your motive. Just do it- Get it Together First!
Watch God in the next 28 days!

Please leave your comments, and help another brother by sharing this post!

#28daystolovingmywife
Taking the risk-training to enhance your marriage and give the next generation a change to emulate.

God Bless and Keep the Faith! 

Virtuous Jewel

MEN'S 28 DAYS TO LOVING MY WIFE CHALLENGE DAY 19 - FINANCES # 5

FINANCIAL SESSION TONIGHT 

JOIN US TONIGHT FOR OUR WEEKLY LIVE CONFERENCE SESSION AT 8:00 PM LOCAL VI TIME / 7:00/6:00 PM US MAINLAND.
Complete all your forms for sessions 1-4 CALL 1-470-888-9447

Theme Verse: Ephesians 5:29
For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

Even if your wife is the financial manger, you SHOULD take the responsibility of the finances or at least know about it!

Have you completed your budget? If not, do so quickly so you can get the full understanding on how to manage your finances in tonight's session.

Where did my money go? BUDGET! BUDGET! BUDGET!!!

TODAY'S ACTIVITY- ACCOUNT FOR EVERY PENNY

Wife: Honey, what did you do with the money?
Husband: I don't know?!
Me: Why don't they know?
Most men do not account for every penny they spend-as they purchase things as they need them or as the urge arises without checking the budget or account.

Today, you will prepare to give an account for every penny you spend. You will use the attached 30 Day Diary Sheet provided as your guide. Practice for the next 10 days and then you will start a fresh one for March to prepare your April budget.

You will record EVERYTHING daily - EVERY income receive and EVERY penny you spend. 

Here's an example:
You stopped at the gas station for gas and spend $30 and you bought a drink $2, the newspaper $1 and give a homeless person $5, you will enter in today's date the 19 under the transportation column $30, food $2, Miscellaneous $1, Tithe/Giving $5. This will help you track where your money goes daily. 

(If you would like you can have your spouse do one and then you combine them into one or she holds the main one and you bring home the receipts so you can have it completed at the end of the day)

Do whichever works best- Just keep a count, you will appreciate it at the end when you tally it all up and see where you have been wasting money and where you could save to be at your appropriate life stage!

Please note that you can cross out any column that does not apply and insert something else that is not included.

Caution: COME CLEAN-You must account for EVERY PENNY!
NOTHING IS INSIGNIFICANT everything must be recorded, a mint, bottle water EVERYTHING including your side monies and gambling or vices!

Remember, MARRIAGE IS A TEAM EFFORT-COMMON PURPOSE!

Don't be discouraged if she doesn't receive it at first or perhaps question your motive. Just do it- Get it Together First! 
Watch God in the next 28 days!

Please leave your comments, and help another brother by sharing this post!

Facebook #28daystolovingmywife 

Taking the risk-training to enhance your marriage and give the next generation a change to emulate.

God Bless you and Keep the Faith! 

Virtuous Jewel